The One about Emmitt.

I've never been really big into football. Aside from occasionally watching my brother's team play during high school, it was never really my cup of tea. However, it's hard to grow up in Texas and not know a little bit about the NFL. Do you know who Emmitt Smith is? Yes, he won Dancing With the Stars in 2006, but I remember him best as the unbelievably respectable Dallas Cowboys running back - #22. He always seemed to handle himself with such etiquette - on the field and off - and had the most welcoming smile with the whitest teeth and the most sparkly eyes.I remember hearing about his induction into the Football Hall of Fame in 2010 where he offered more than a nice smile and manners. He offered wisdom in a phrase so plain and simple, yet so memorable and so applicable to so many. He said, "Never, never let others define you."

For as far back as I can remember, I have all too often allowed other people's opinions of me characterize who I am, who I'll become, and what I do. You would think that since I am able to recognize this weakness, I might be able to overcome it. But here I am: twenty-four years old and still letting people's words get the best of me.

In addition to this, for as far back as I can remember, I haven't been quiet about the people that mean the most to me. I don't just walk life without making it clear - through some love language or another - that I care for certain people, and that care is not something that I take lightly. It's something, instead, that I cherish.

These two things put together led to my nearly-three-month blog hiatus and my making my blog by invitation only. I won't go into much detail about exactly what occurred; truthfully, it isn't even worth repeating. It also isn't worth it to let something so petty get in the way of something I loved to do. Write, or better yet, express.

Back in January, I wrote a post about how important this blog was to me. I said, "[My blog] has become strangely therapeutic - something that I don't really take very lightly and something that I hold very close to my heart." It blessed my life when I wrote because I allowed myself those "soapboxes." I allowed myself those moments of question, of cheesiness, and yes, even of sharing how much I care about one person or another.

It's a fact: when I care about someone, I show it. This has been something in my life that I have been proud of. And I refuse to be the wimp that lets three lashed-out sentences from an obviously confused bystander define this blog.

So I'm back. Hopefully in full-swing. Over the next couple of weeks, I'll fill in about my experiences over the last three months. Of course there have been plenty, and of course I'll talk your ear off about each and every one.

The blog isn't even by invitation only anymore. I want people to read it. If they don't, that's okay, too... because I'm still making a choice to write, which makes me happy. A choice to be happier.

I'm not going to sugar-coat this. It won't be easy. It was a habit writing and now it's a habit to not write. There will be that nagging voice in the back of my mind that tugs and tears and reminds me why I stopped writing for three months. And I imagine it will be there for a while.

But Emmitt Smith offers even more applicable advice, "Consistency shows value. Consistency is necessary for trust, durability and longevity. You have to show up every week no matter how difficult the game or life might be."